Tickets in Oregon

I got pulled over 6 times while I was in Oregon. Some of them were pretty dumb. Pulling into the right of two lanes when making a left turn. Changing lanes too rapidly. Shayna got pulled over for quick signaling, "I know.... not the crime of the century." That's a direct quote from the cop. She got pulled over 5 times. While I got 2 tickets, she got none. Boy isn't it nice to be a blond woman who can whip out the tears when she needs them?!?!

One of my tickets was the most deserved ticket of my life. I was flying, and I was late for Wednesday night prayer meeting. I came up about 4 minutes late and ran the red light left turn into the parking lot of the church. As the motorcycle cop came to the window he looked surprised. He asked me if I was late, and I told him that I was late for prayer meeting. With everyone watching me from the church door, he proceeded to write me a ticket, and tell me that he counted to three as I went through the red light. Bummer. The senior pastor asked me when I got in there, "How's your confidence?" "Low," I replied.

Another ticket I got at a police trap in the middle of the country as we were looking for the highway and the speed limit was 55. It changed to 35, but we never saw that because we were trying to read the maps that Shayna had sprawled out in the front seat. He actually didn't pull me over until we were on the freeway (This came very soon after the speed change). Wham Bam Thank You Sir. 15 mph over the limit. This ticket came three months after the other ticket.

What I found out next was extremely disappointing. If you get 3 tickets in 3 years then Oregon takes away your CDL license. I was ticket free on my record before I moved to Oregon. Now I was in danger of getting my license taken away. Stupid Oregon cops! Something had to be done. For the next 2 years and 10 months I was an angel. It seemed like I was going to make it. Then a fateful day came....

It was a Tuesday Morning, and I was leaving staff meeting at the church heading for PAA (Portland Adventist Academy). They had chapel on Tuesday mornings. I was driving toward the sunset boulevard freeway in a 30mph zone. I was following a white Prius in the right lane of a 5 lane road with a turning lane in the center. He was doing 33ish, so I was doing 33ish. As we were approaching a green light, it began to turn yellow. He slammed on his brakes. In a split second I was pissed. We both were easily going to make it, and he put me in danger by slamming on his brakes. I whipped my wheel left and right to enter the lane just left of him heading the same direction and pressed the gas pedal down in our V6 Honda Accord with a look of Pissedness while I did it. It was in that moment that I realized the reason for this mans incredibly stupid halt. This particular intersection was armed with photo red lights.

I have always prided myself with being level headed in crazy situations. It seems like people freeze or freak out, but I just get stuff done when the going gets bizarre. What happened next makes me seem like a complete liar about what I just wrote.

In my moment of enlightenment I immediately slammed on my brakes. However, it was far too late for that to be of value. Inertia was taking over as everything in the car became airborne death objects continuing to fly at 30mph until they hit a target. Something light hit the back of my seat, while heavy things were landing up against other seats, the dash board, and the windshield. My wheels made that awesome screeching sound that everyone can hear within 20 miles. The entire time I watched the light waiting for it to change to red.

As soon as I realized that I couldn't stop behind the white line, I also realized that I could have easily made it through the light with it still being yellow. Where I actually stopped was right in the very middle of this major intersection watching a yellow light. Then....wait for it....finally....Red. For a split second I thought, "Maybe because I'm not moving in the intersection the camera won't take a picture because it will think nothing is happening." So I lowered my towering head that was being hidden by the mirror and the fact that I'm tall and I tend to be close to the roof of cars. I looked at the camera to see what would happen, just in time for the Flash.

Probably the the icing on the cake is that I decided to wear my wife's sunglasses that were white with a bunch of jewels in them. Brilliant. I took in a deep breath and sigh. I pressed on the gas and went through the light. What kind of an idiot stops in the middle of an intersection on a yellow light and looks at the hidden camera so that it can get a better picture. Me.

I prayed like crazy. I was telling God that I know I didn't deserve grace or forgiveness, but I needed it. I called myself an idiot a hundred times. I even gave God a guilt trip telling him that I had only ever used my CDL for the church. Not a single time had I used it for myself. I begged and begged. I prayed every time I went to the mailbox for three months. And finally I realized that no ticket was coming. God had answered my prayer. period.

I don't really care how, but one day I would like to know. Was the cop who reviews the video laughing at me so hard that he decided I was too much of an idiot to deserve a ticket? Did he call others in to see the video too? Or maybe he sees that ridiculousness all the time and is numb to it. Maybe God deleted the record. I don't know, but I received grace, and this taught me a lesson about myself. There are situations where I don't do the right things. I don't care how level headed and intelligent I am. There are times that I make decisions that are just plain wrong. Not intentional sins, but unintentional and unavoidable ones. Those are the ones that I really need grace for. Things that I definitely am aware and responsible for, but they were unintentional and unavoidable.

Enjoy the Journey

This isn't a new thought: It's not necessarily about where your going, but it's about enjoying the road there: both the ups and the downs.

I was reading love wins, and I had this thought as I am writing a sermon on finding your purpose in life.

Sermon on Communion (I felt like it was good)

This morning is the beginning of a 4 part sermon series on the sanctuary, and the covenant. Before we get started this morning, let us begin with a word of prayer. Dear Lord, thank you for your love and guidance. Thank you for your care and inspiration. Thank you for working in our hearts and lives. Thank you for making us promises, and especially the promise of the Holy Spirit. I ask now that you would cover our lives and be in our hearts and mind through the power of the Spirit. Let Him live in us and do a work bringing us to conviction. Thank you Lord, Amen.

This morning our topic is going to be focused on the beginning and foundation for the sanctuary or tabernacle of the Old Testament. We are going to be exploring the covenant of the Old Testament and the covenant of the New Testament. Believe it or not, this study has much to do with communion. Since we have communion coming up very soon, I thought it would make sense to increase our knowledge and understanding of this sacrament. In fact it is important for us to be partaking of this experience correctly according to Paul. In 1 Corinthians 11:27 Paul writes, “So then, whoever eats the bread or drinks the cup of the Lord in an unworthy manner will be guilty of sinning against the body and blood of the Lord.” Paul was writing for a specific instance in which people were stuffing themselves with the Lord’s Supper; but he was also covering his bases in case another problem was to arise. It is pretty clear that there are big consequences if we are taking in communion inappropriately. That is why there is significance to understanding what we are doing in the best way possible.

So, let us begin our study.

What is communion? It is essential to answer this question at the beginning and the end so that we can see if we have grown. To some of us, it may be eating a small piece of bread and drinking out of a little cup. It may be the awkward thing we do when we wash each other’s feet. This has always been a tough thing for me to do, because I feel like it is a useless act. Everyone, for the most part, has clean feet when they come to church, so I don’t really feel like I am accomplishing anything when I wash someone’s feet. They don’t even pass out soap to use! Of course, when you understand it in the light of symbolism it takes on more significance. The same is true with the bread and wine that we drink. If the disciples looked at Jesus and said, “This isn’t your body or your blood,” they would be correct. They would have missed the symbolic point, but they would have been correct. So, we shouldn’t approach the topic bringing our culture into it, but rather, we should understand it and bring the symbolic significance out of it.

Turn with me in your Bibles to Exodus 19:5. We are going to pick up the story of the children of Israel after they have crossed the Red Sea, and set up camp at the base of Mt. Sinai. Moses has set up 12 pillars at the bottom of the mountain that the people should not pass. They have gathered at the foot of the mountain to overhear as God speaks to Moses. Notice what it says in verse 9 before we read verse 5 and 6, “And the Lord said unto Moses, Lo, I come unto thee in a thick cloud, that the people may hear when I speak with thee, and believe thee for ever. And Moses told the words of the people unto the Lord.” Moses is playing a messenger boy roll. He is bringing the words of the people to God, and the words of God to the people, even though they can hear each other. Another important note is that the Lord has come down in a thick cloud, but we will talk more about that later. For now let’s pick up at verse 5, “Now therefore if ye will obey my voice indeed, and keep my covenant, then ye shall be a peculiar treasure unto me above all people for all the earth is mine: And ye shall be unto me a kingdom of priests, and an holy nation. These are the words which thou shalt speak unto the children of Israel.” What does this sound like? When you look at these verses and highlight the words “if” and “then” there may be some clues as to what is happening here. This is a verbal contract. This is what people do before they sit down and sign papers. The two groups represented here, God and Israel, are declaring the terms of a contract they intend to sign together. God says that their part is to obey his commandments, and as a result he will make them special. The special that God is making them is a priestly special; it is the right to share with the world the message that God will give them, and that is about the coming Messiah. God is going to make them a priestly nation giving them a tabernacle, and ordinances, and rituals that are all going to be representing God and His plan to reconnect with humanity. The people answer God in verse 8, “…All that the Lord hath spoken we will do.”

God then tells the people to prepare for the signing of the contract in verses 10 and 22, “And the Lord said unto Moses, God unto the people, and sanctify them today and tomorrow, and let them wash their clothes… And let the priests also, which come near to the Lord, sanctify themselves, lest the Lord break forth upon them.” This preparation requires a physical washing with water. What is interesting is the people and the priests are required to wash their clothes, but later there is given another example of priests are supposed to wash. It is possible that the priests are required to wash in that same way as early as at the base of Mt. Sinai in Exodus 19. Exodus 29:4 says, “And Aaron and his sons thou shalt bring unto the door of the tabernacle of the congregation, and shalt wash them with water.” Leviticus 8:6 says, “And Moses brought Aaron and his sons, and washed them with water.” There is this conclusion that can be inferred from the text that priests were not to wash themselves, but rather be washed by another priest. If we take seriously the call that God has given us to be priests today throughout the New Testament then this has serious implications on us today. If we believe in the priesthood of all believers, and we see 1 Peter 2 as more than a great illustration then we are being called to participate in this work of helping to wash each other. But what does that mean under our current circumstances? Are we supposed to be washing each other’s entire bodies like the Old Testament?

In order to get a better grasp of the significance of this experience in our lives we need to turn to Hebrews 9:13: “The blood of goats and bulls and the ashes of a heifer sprinkled on those who are ceremonially unclean sanctify them so that they are outwardly clean.” We all understand that in times before Christ the sacrifices and rituals of the tabernacle represented what Christ would do in the future. When Christ came he began the work of atonement, and then instead of just outward cleansing, there was inward cleansing as well. Look at the next verse after 13, verse 14 “How much more, then, will the blood of Christ, who through the eternal Spirit offered himself unblemished to God, cleanse our consciences from acts that lead to death, so that we may serve the living God!” There is this concept that the physical symbol or type of the Old Testament found and is finding its spiritual fulfillment in the New Testament. The things they did at the base of Sinai and in the Tabernacle are still things happening, but they are no longer cleansing just outwardly, they are cleansing inwardly too. Look at Hebrews 10:16,21,22, “This is the covenant I will make with them after that time, says the Lord. I will put my laws in their hearts, and I will write them on their minds…and since we have a great priest over the house of God, let us draw near to God with a sincere heart and with the full assurance that faith brings, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water.” There is this idea that seems like things that once happened where everyone could see are now happening inside of us.

So, has the outward illustration of these events become completely unnecessary? Are we just going through a bunch of useless motions that are awkward and meaningless? No! Let’s find the antitype of this Old Testament idea of washing before we as priests approach God in John 13:4-17, “so he got up from the meal, took off his outer clothing, and wrapped a towel around his waist.After that, he poured water into a basin and began to wash his disciples’ feet, drying them with the towel that was wrapped around him. He came to Simon Peter, who said to him, “Lord, are you going to wash my feet?” Jesus replied, “You do not realize now what I am doing, but later you will understand.” “No,” said Peter, “you shall never wash my feet.” Jesus answered, “Unless I wash you, you have no part with me.” “Then, Lord,” Simon Peter replied, “not just my feet but my hands and my head as well!” Jesus answered, “Those who have had a bath need only to wash their feet; their whole body is clean. And you are clean, though not every one of you.” For he knew who was going to betray him, and that was why he said not everyone was clean. When he had finished washing their feet, he put on his clothes and returned to his place. “Do you understand what I have done for you?” he asked them. “You call me ‘Teacher’ and ‘Lord,’ and rightly so, for that is what I am. Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash one another’s feet. I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you. Very truly I tell you, no servant is greater than his master, nor is a messenger greater than the one who sent him. Now that you know these things, you will be blessed if you do them. “

So clearly the physical act was commanded to be continued. In Hebrews we see that Jesus as our high priest is washing us with “pure water” inwardly and spiritually cleansing us from the sin we have. Then we find in John at the foundation of communion, the act of physically washing each other’s feet, just like the priests would do in the Old Testament to prepare themselves to meet God. We are going to find out in the next sermon how deeply the priesthood goes, and how it has a broader application in the time after Christ’s death. For now it becomes clear that the step of washing each other’s feet has great significance. In fact it may have so much cleansing significance that if we don’t participate in that crucial step then we may not be prepared to partake of the bread and the wine. We could be missing a crucial blessing if we are not participating in the entire cleansing process.

But really, how significant could foot washing be? God isn’t really going to pass me up for not washing someone’s feet, right? I can’t really answer that question positively, but I can show you the type and the antitypical command of Paul. In Exodus 19 we read about how God wanted them to wash in case God were to “break forth upon them.” I think now is the time that we understand this “cloud” in which God was traveling. Let’s read Exodus 19:16-18, “On the morning of the third day there was thunder and lightning, with a thick cloud over the mountain, and a very loud trumpet blast. Everyone in the camp trembled. Then Moses led the people out of the camp to meet with God, and they stood at the foot of the mountain. Mount Sinai was covered with smoke, because the LORD descended on it in fire. The smoke billowed up from it like smoke from a furnace, and the whole mountain trembled violently.” This sounds like God showed up on the mountain in a cloud of smoke. It seems that the cloud that God uses to conceal His presence is a cloud of smoke. This makes sense to think of one of the main characteristics of God is incredible consuming glorious fire. Think of some familiar stories: God shows up to Moses in a burning bush, fire comes from heaven and consumes Abel’s and Elijah’s sacrifice, Elijah is taken to heaven in a burning or fiery chariot, God led Israel by a cloud by day and a fire by night, fire came down and started the alter of incense and then filled the temple, God showed up on Mt. Sinai in a fire covered by a cloud of smoke, Jesus is seen with burning feet and eyes in Revelation, and finally God is referred to in the Bible as a consuming fire in Hebrews 12:29.

So if God is a consuming fire, what does that mean? Is God really fire? That almost seems like I’m putting God in a single elemental box if I limit God to a ball of fire. I can only speculate using the evidence, but I would say that God is God, and to some it appears that he is fire. That fire could be just a result of an incredible amount of light, or it could be that it is truly fire. What does this fire consume? Isaiah 59 verses one and two seem to imply that God has separated himself from us because of our sins. This also can be seen possibly in the destruction of Sodom, as well as in the story of Nadab and Abihu. Another practice of the Old Testament sanctuary along with washing the priests to prepare to meet God was to carry a censer with fire from the Altar of Burnt Offering that God had started with incense on the fire. Nadab and Abihu, acting as priest, brought fire from another source into God’s Tabernacle. This was sin, and as a result the Bible says in Leviticus 10:2, “And there went out fire from the Lord, and devoured them, and they died before the Lord.” Now, here we can list a couple of facts: Nadab and Abihu were priests. They were performing the role of priest which includes working with a representation of the body and blood of Jesus. They brought sin into the sanctuary not for the purpose of cleansing. A judgment was executed upon them right there. When you compare that with what Paul says in 1 Corinthians 11:27 about taking care in performing the Eucharist, there seems to be a great significance in cleansing each other even if it is just in the spiritual symbolism.

What happens next in our story back in Exodus? Well, to review, we have a verbal contractual agreement between God and Israel about becoming a priestly nation. The nation cleanses with water in preparation to meet God. In Exodus 20 we find the next step of the process when God declares the 10 commandments out loud for all to hear. Of course this scares the people so they tell Moses that they can’t handle God being that close and loud. They ask Moses to go up the mountain and then just come tell them what he says. So Moses does that, and brings them the words of the Lord with the 10 commandments in verbal form to which the people again agree. Later there were stone tablets that had this law written on them and placed inside the tabernacle at the foundation of God’s throne. They were kept in the Ark of the Covenant below the Shekinah Glory which was God himself. This gives new meaning to the Ark of the Covenant, because we see it is the container of the basis of the contract God made with Israel. Now, is there a place in the New Testament where we find this happening? Is there somewhere that Christ gives his disciples a law or commandments? Turn with me to John 13:34, “A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another.” Here at the same last supper that Jesus washed his disciples feet, cleansing them, like the priests of old, he gives them a commandment to follow. This is why God said, “This is the covenant I will make with them after that time, says the Lord. I will put my laws in their hearts, and I will write them on their minds.” The basis of the covenant we are making with God through communion is His law of love being written in our hearts and minds, then being expressed toward humanity. We are agreeing to participate in God’s plan of bringing the world back to being at one with Him and His law of love.

Following this agreement, Moses and some of the young men of Israel performed some of the most significant functions in our model of the Old Testament type representing communion, or The Lords Supper. They offered two sacrifices mentioned in Exodus 24:5, “burnt offerings…and…peace offerings”. These offerings have different significance. The burnt offering was performed every morning and evening, and it completely consumed the flesh and made atonement for sin. This offering given in this instance, Exodus 24, was a special burnt offering that made atonement for the sin of the entire camp of Israel, while at the same time there was a covenant being created with God. The peace offering was an offering that was brought by the freewill of whoever brought it. If it was for all of Israel, then it was given by the freewill of all Israel. What is interesting is frequently there was offered the fat of the peace offering with the burnt offering. So at the same time that forgiveness of sin was happening, God and man were communing together in peace. This was a process where atonement and communion were being created and recreated on a continual basis. Another interesting note is that God, the priest, and the one who brought the offering would all partake of the peace offering as they communed. This is an incredible illustration of what happened both at Sinai and at The Last Supper. Exodus 24:5 tells us of the young men offering the burnt and peace offerings, then the elders and Moses go up on the mountain into the “cloud,” and the Bible says they see God and eat a meal with Him! Let’s read Exodus 24:9-11, “Moses and Aaron, Nadab and Abihu, and the seventy elders of Israel went up and saw the God of Israel. Under his feet was something like a pavement made of lapis lazuli, as bright blue as the sky. But God did not raise his hand against these leaders of the Israelites; they saw God, and they ate and drank.”

I sure haven’t read many places in the Bible where it says that man saw God! That is crazy! So, the question of course is, can we find the antitype in the New Testament? Of course we immediately think of The Lord’s Supper when Jesus, God in the flesh, ate with the elders of the upcoming Christian church. Jesus took bread and broke it saying exactly what the representation of the Old Testament sacrifices represented. Our text in 1 Corinthians 11 tells us that Jesus said, “Take, eat: this is my body broken for you: this do in remembrance of me.” This gift represented the forgiveness of the sins of those who ate, and the communion of peace that they were sharing with God. This was each parties signature on the covenant they were agreeing to keep.

Before we conclude though, there is one glaring memento to cover: the blood/wine. In Exodus we find that Moses performed an important action with the blood, “Moses then took the blood, sprinkled it on the people and said, “This is the blood of the covenant that the LORD has made with you in accordance with all these words.(Exodus 24:8)” Here the wording seems to almost direct us to 1 Corinthians and back to The Last Supper where Christ says, “This cup is the new covenant in my blood; do this, whenever you drink it, in remembrance of me.” But then, what is the significance of the blood?

I was working at camp this past summer working with an interim windsurfing instructor who was in need of some good venting. It was my job to be the staff’s pastor, so I happened to be the ear he was bending. He was telling me that it was unfair how he was being treated. He was expected to teach windsurfing to kids the week before but he didn’t know how to windsurf himself. He wanted to spend some time learning from the windsurfing instructor before he left so that he could learn, then practice, and finally teach the kids. The waterfront director would not agree. The director said that it would be better for him to learn from experience. The interim instructor was telling me how it went terribly because he didn’t even know what the parts of the contraption were called, let alone how to work them. Now he was being reprimanded by the waterfront director.

This is the same concept here at work with the blood of the sanctuary of old, and the one of new. It is only by Christ “showing us the father” that we have begun to see an example. Jesus lived a perfect life that we as His followers are trying to shape our lives by learning from and mirroring. In a very real sense, we are learning from the instructor, practicing, and then teaching others. The blood was sprinkled on the people as a covering and a representation of the life of Christ. Leviticus 17:11 says, “For the life of a creature is in the blood, and I have given it to you to make atonement for yourselves on the altar; it is the blood that makes atonement for one’s life.” It would be nice to say that only one of the aspects of the sanctuary made atonement. It might be easier to nail down what each aspect did in the process of atonement. It isn’t quite that easy because they frequently all have many overlapping functions. In this case, it says that the blood makes atonement, but so do many other things in the sanctuary. What is the function of the blood in the atonement process? Well, it says here that it is representing the life of the creature. Let’s look at Hebrews 10:19,22, “Therefore, brothers and sisters, since we have confidence to enter the Most Holy Place by the blood of Jesus…let us draw near to God with a sincere heart and with the full assurance that faith brings, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water.” Here we see that Christ has made a way to enter to the Most Holy Place by His blood which represents His life. So it is through Christ’s life that we have a way to God, because it is Christ’s life that God sees represented in those who have taken in Christ! At first verse 22 seems to be speaking about our hearts being sprinkled with water, but actually it speaking of blood. In the Old Testament Sanctuary the priests would sprinkle the blood of some of the sacrifices of the sin offering inside the sanctuary before God’s throne on the horns of the altar of incense, and before the veil separating us from God. In our story in Exodus the blood is sprinkled on the people. If we apply that to our understanding of Hebrews, we find Christ sprinkling His beautiful life in our temple bodies cleansing our guilty conscience. As we view more of Christ we become convicted of sin that we, along side of our High Priest Christ, rid of our temples. This also fills the dual purpose of covering us with His perfect life so that we can approach the throne of God!

Doesn’t this enlighten communion quite a bit? When we look at communion now, we can realize all the elements that are happening. God signed a covenant about announcing the coming Messiah and keeping the law with the nation of Israel. Then God signed a covenant about announcing the come and coming Messiah, and writing the law of God on our hearts and minds with the elders of the Christian church at The Last Supper. God was consistent, going carefully through the same steps he had gone through at the base of Sinai. Now we are a part of the priesthood of all believers going through the same steps as the disciples with Jesus. We wash to cleanse ourselves before we meet with God. We sit down to eat with Him part of His sacrifice. We partake of the representations of His broken body and His blood for the forgiveness of our sins and the cleansing of our consciences. By eating this meal with Jesus we are agreeing to his law of love, which is being written on our hearts and minds. Then we go out forgiven and cleansed to tell the world of the Messiah that came and is coming back!

Our Journey

When I was about 14 or 15 years old I was a studmuffin basketball player. I am a decent basketball player now, but back then I was incredible. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a better basketball player now than I was then, but for my age I was a dominate figure. I think it was because I was 6 foot and 145 lbs. When you are that age, that is gigantic and the perfect shooting height. I had a couple of college neighbors that lived up the street and they would invite me up to play ball. They very much thought they were ladies men. I think they felt the full excitement about their age and opportunities where they went to school and worked. These guys were pretty close friends, and they would hang out together all the time. We played 21, and sometimes we played 2 on 2 if we could find another person. They let me play with them because I was good enough at my age to keep up with them on defense, and I could also score.

One afternoon I walked out my front door and it was a beautiful spring day. The birds were chirping, and my body felt like it was made for basketball particularly that day. I decided to head up to Scott’s house. I dribbled my ball up the gravel road and went up to the door. As I was approaching the doorway I saw the door begin to open. I almost fell flat on my butt. My throat closed up and I became sweaty. My palms started to feel clammy and I knew I had met the definition of beauty. This 5 foot 6 inch college girl was swinging the door open. As the door open her hair blew backwards and yet it seemed as if the camera was zooming in on her at the same time. I am sure she saw me picking up my jaw off the ground because I got a smirky smile from her as she walked by looking very hot.

I watched her get into her car and leave. I then turned to see Scott laughing at me as I was still caught up in her flipping hair and perfectly curvy body. I told him to shut up and that she was smoking hot. He told me that he completely agreed. I got the feeling that he was interested, and so I tauntingly asked him, “So bro, that your girl?” “No man.” He replied. I came back with, “Oh, so your just hooking up with her then.” He looked at me a little disgusted. I didn’t expect that, so I continued, “Oh snap, she won’t give you none. haha!” (I was a little uncouth and irreligious in my comments). Scott actually stopped making the sandwich he was making on the island in his kitchen and looked at me. I thought he was going to be ticked at me. Maybe he would come over the counter and tackle me. He was the type of guy that wouldn’t have a problem wrestling me to the ground and “teaching me a lesson.” (of course all in good fun). Instead he surprised me and said, “If she actually was even willing to have sex with me, I would lose a lot of respect for her. In fact, I wouldn’t sleep with her even if she wanted to.” I was blown away! “What?! She is so hot though. How could you not?” He answered, “She is different from me, and she wants other things. I appreciate her for who she is and who she wants to be. I wouldn’t want to mess up that, or our friendship.”

This is the idea that speaks to the post-modern mindset of community accountability. Accountability. Accountability. It almost seems like post-moderns don’t have a means of holding each other accountable. How do you allow for people to be whoever they want to be and still hold them accountable. The Bible speaks about accountability. Frequently we take our examples of accountability from stories like Jonah and the Whale (big fish). We attack people with issues they are not doing right and try to hold them accountable to our institution, or our leader, or our own personal convictions. I’m going to spend a whole chapter dealing with problems, but the focus of this chapter is understanding how we are supposed to journey together, “Our Journey.”

Without a doubt the Bible clearly wants us to journey together! I believe that. The trick is understanding the difference between “My Journey” and “Our Journey”. My journey is where I am learning and growing and journeying with Christ. Our journey is where YOU hold ME accountable for MY convictions. In my story, Scott was a friend with a person that wasn’t like him in where he was going, what he was doing, or who he was. Yet, they were still friends. They hung out together, communicated over phone and email, and shared in the journey of life. However, they did not look down on each other for their actions. They did not condemn each other for being different and holding different values from themselves. Most importantly, they didn’t expect the other person to be the person they are.

The same approach is the approach we should have with each other in our relationships. I shouldn’t be condemning someone for something they are not convicted of. I should qualify that a little bit. Someone that is searching after Jesus, and has begun a walk with Him, doesn’t need me telling them all that they are doing wrong, or even one thing they are doing wrong. Instead I should be asking them with what they are working with Jesus on right now. I can then give support, encouragement, accountability, and inspiration to help them in their journey. It is my task to encourage them on THEIR journey, and hold them accountable for THEIR convictions, and help them to stand up for what THEY believe. They should be encouraging me on MY journey, and holding me accountable for MY convictions, and help me stand up for what I believe. This is “Our Journey” that we are on! This takes out the people that want to point out where people are failing, because they won’t know what someone is working on unless they have a relationship with them.

To sum up, let me say this: If you come to me and ask me to help you, I will. But I’m not going to tell you where you are failing…until you ask.

Learning to Stand

I am taking a class called Revelation, Inspiration, and Hermeneutics. I don't claim to be anything special, but this was reassurance to me that my attempt to write a book is worth it. Dr. Fernando Canale, who I disagree with on tons of points, pointed out that no one has addressed a way of approach for Adventists to the scriptures. That is a large part of what I'm going to try to do.

I plan to of course represent my Post-Modern bias, but fully develop the need for religious tolerance, multiple interpretations, and our own personal commitment to our personal conclusions. It will be about learning how to stand up for what you believe without causing division between you and someone else in the church.

Probably no one will read it, but I will write it anyhow.

My Journey

I have had many friends come up to me over the years of my life speaking of their issues in Pornography. To them this is sin, and to me this is sin, so I will continue to refer to it as such. I believe that I can count on my hands and toes the amount of times that I have sought out pictures or videos of naked humans. I think that half of those times might have been pretty early in my adolescence and the curiosity of nudity was mysterious and tantalizing. Even then I wasn’t that interested. I remember the very first time I saw a naked woman in a magazine.

I was probably 13 years old, and I was walking with my cousin Lou through some woods in Federalsburg MD. This was a bizarre patch of woods, because I remember roads surrounding it, and it wasn’t really close to anything except roads. We were tramping through them and as we were walking Lou pointed to the ground and said there was the remains of a magazine that hadn’t burnt all the way in the fire. We walked over to it, and bent down. There were enough sheets for both of us to have a couple. The imprinting laser began in my brain and never have I forgotten what was on that paper. I remember that Lou was unimpressed and walked away. I stayed and analyzed these pictures like George the monkey. Soon Lou yelled for me to come, and like a dog I was away, but I brought the sheets with me. Eventually I dropped them by the way because I felt I had absorbed all the information for that time, and I didn’t really think much more of it.

I wasn’t really captivated by that experience and craving more like so many men are. I was more curious and when my curiosity had been filled, and I felt like I understood, then pictures of nudity have done little to ensnare me. I know that this is gift from God. I believe it with all my heart, because this is something that is the bane of many, young and old. The reason I note this is because I am very good friends with many people that struggle with this sin. I am also very close with many who don’t struggle with this because they don’t believe it to be sin. It is very easy for me not to condemn them because I realize that wherever they are on that path, it is probably different than where I am on that path. I also realize that in this particular sin, I can’t empathize with them. However, when they come to me and ask me to help them with accountability, then I am more than willing and happy to help. It is an obligation for me to support them on their journey. No, it is my responsibility. If they asked me to join them in it, I would immediately say No. It is not for me to begin a sin for any reason, including peer pressure. I need to stand up for my journey and what I believe. but still in a sense, I journey with them. This is the idea of My Journey vs. Our Journey.

My Journey:

My journey is something that is unique to me. I become convicted of something, and no matter what happens I should stand up for my convictions. I feel like a lot of people are confused about this fact. There are three roads that I see people taking because of their confusion.

The first is to relinquish their position and join whoever or whatever in what they believe to be wrong or sin.This usually comes as a result of peer pressure. Or the desire to no longer try to fight against the carnal nature. And it is one way to find relief when you are overcome with the shame of being noticed for sin. Sometimes it happens because someone thinks they are witnessing by not standing up for what they believe to be right. There are many scenarios where people choose not to stand up for their convictions.

The second is to avoid all together those people that may be different from them in their understanding. Like a person that is Liberal being uncomfortable around a Conservative because they honestly don’t agree. Or to make it even broader, like a right wing republican hanging out with a left wing democrat. The can’t even enjoy each others company because it seems that every conversation turns into an argument. If you were to spend an evening with these opposites, listening to them, it may go something like this: They meet for dinner at a restaurant and the Liberal orders appetizers for both and an entree, while the conservative gets a salad without the meat and no salad dressing, with a side of olive oil and a cut lemon slice. The Liberal is offended because the Conservative won’t eat the appetizer. The Conservative tells him how fat and unhealthy it is with pork in it that causes trichinosis. The conversation lasts a while until they have exhausted all information on earth about the health of the meal and not being so rigid. Later conversation about politics comes up. The Conservative begins with talk about how crazy it is that any Christians would support someone who believes in killing babies and allowing people of the same sex to marry. It is a Christian obligation to vote and support pro-life. The Liberal, of course, parries with the rights of any man to choose what he wants to believe, the basis of the constitution, and the necessity of separation of church and state. They make hurtful remarks basically condemning the other for having an opinion besides their own and then they leave for icecream. The Conservative kindly offers to drive his 1980 pickup truck that gets all of 8 miles to the gallon and is exempt from emissions tests. The Liberal is appalled but keeps his mouth shut about the need to save earth from destruction as the Conservative rants about his love for his truck. When they reach the icecream shop the Liberal orders a respectable cone, but not ridiculous in size, while the Conservative orders a vanilla wafer. The argue once again about why they even came if they weren’t going to enjoy the experience, to which comes the response, “for the conversation.” At this both are silent. Finally the Liberal invites the Conservative home to watch his favorite TV show, to which the Conservative contorts that he doesn’t have a TV because nature is so much more enjoyable than stuffing your head with filth.

I almost wish for their sake they would give up. It is pitiful the words that we speak to each other to burn them for the things that we think they are being to liberal or rigid over. Both of those men can talk about the things that are important to them with love and acceptance if they are both willing. Both of those men can share meaningful time together doing stuff they both appreciate if they are both wanting. If instead of condemnation at the forks in the road, we should be giving each other more than tolerance…admiration. There is nothing saying that a Liberal can’t eat and completely enjoy eating a pig while admiring a well spoken and caring Conservative telling why he personally is convicted that pork is wrong…for him.

The third are those oblivious, just don’t get it, or see the big picture Christians. They often take their journey and project it on others. Maybe they are talking your ear off about religious things without giving heed to social cues while your thinking…look buddy, this is great, but would you shut up already. Maybe they are coming up to you pointing out the things that they think you are doing wrong because of the conviction they feel in their journey. Maybe they are telling you that the institution or person to whom you belong is corrupt and they list all the ways they’ve been wronged, and they tell themselves that they are giving you a “heads up”. And don’t we all know that having someone give us a “heads up” is exactly what we want?

The problem that occurs if we live other peoples journey’s is that we are failing to live up to the person that God wants us to be. So there is the “all about me” conversation. It is fantastic when someone tells you about their views on religion, but if you haven’t journeyed down that road yet, or if you haven’t wrestled with that subject, then they are rattling your ear off for naught. Maybe you are wanting to get into that study but you haven’t yet. This isn’t a post about social cues, so I’ll simply say that some people are hard to talk to (or listen to), and people that aren’t concerned about your journey with Christ. They should be giving you the same courtesy that you give them. Then there is the perpetual “eagle eyes” (great accuser) of the church that comes up to “help” you see the “pit of despond” that you have fallen into “Christian.” (that is a play off of Pilgrim’s Progress). They don’t understand that once again you may not be where they are in their Christianity. What is worse is that you want to point all of their hypocrisies, but boy, that just feels like you are stooping to their level so you don’t, or maybe you do. If you let someone point out everything that you do wrong for the rest of your life, then that person would always be finding something because we are not perfect… and that LITERALLY would be the Devil’s job. Sometimes I wonder if people realize that they are performing the Devil’s job being the accuser of the brethren. Amongst the many other conversations, there are the ones about “who to watch out for.” Now, I would not like to be walking through a field enjoying the flowers and the field and the sunshine and the weather, and not be warned about the cow pie that I’m about to step into. That’s a nice illustration, but somehow people use that all the time as an excuse to point out the bad in others. Isn’t it nice to just live life and experience things for ourselves sometimes? It is very nice when someone points out danger before we enter it. But how often is that illustration construed into an opportunity for a person to talk about how they were “abused” by something or someone else….start the gossip train rolling. If we enter other situations through another’s journey, how does that leave room for us to learn about that person and institution for ourselves and make an objective decision about it? This also makes it difficult to allow room for that person or institution to make any changes.

It is quite unrealistic for us to realize that these conversations, or others like them, won’t happen. They are simply things that we will have to cope with for the rest of our lives. If you understand the difference between the journey that you are on and the journey that they are on, it can give you the power and knowledge of how to handle these situations and many others; without the projection of feelings, beliefs, thoughts, experiences, and still at the same time standing up for where you are in your journey.

My journey is a journey that I am accumulating to the best of MY ability the information given to me to make the best possible decision. That includes the information that the person gives that only cares about talking about themselves. That includes the information that the person points out that I am doing things wrong. That includes the information that the person gives me cautioning me to be weary of someone or something. I gather that information and I study it, and I give it attention and time for my emotions to cool, then I pray that God would give me understanding to take a stand. That becomes something that I am willing to stand up to my closest friend about or the greatest King or my bitterest enemy, until new information has been gathered and I make a better decision. Always you are keeping this information in mind realizing that you may not have enough information to make the perfect decision. That means when the next person comes along preaching the opposite thing, you can be open enough to realize that they actually may be right. Then you follow the same steps to conclude whether they are or not. Even in the midst of that, you can be clear about your current stance and give support for the reasons you are taking that stand and not condemning others for their stands.

A couple of stories about my Dad

When I was about 10 my life revolved around telling my dad that he needed to stop smoking. Ok, maybe it didn’t “revolve” around that, but it had a seriously large roll in it. Many times I would act like I was going to take his cigarettes and throw them in the garbage. He would let me know in words and actions that it wouldn’t end well for me if I did that. Well, the day of course arrived like a perfectly wrapped present. I was ready to test his will. The cigarettes were sitting out on the counter in the basement and he was upstairs. The bathroom was empty. It couldn’t have been a more professional wrapping job.

I grabbed the pack and went into the bathroom. Think!! Umm, what should I do with them. Oh I know, I will flush them down the toilet. One, Two, Three, Fou…NO, I will stop with three and see what happens. I watched as the toilet bowl filled with water and then calmly emptied. The cigarettes were like little mini warships shooting laughter right at my heart. The floated up with the water, and then down with the water, and then back to level with the water. They weren’t going down. Oh no! I thought. This was even worse than before. Now I have to deal with the cigarettes in the toilet and the pack in my hand. Think, THINK!!! The trash….NO, he will find them there. The sink….No, what if they clog it up. The shower….Hey, those aren’t normal sized drainholes in the shower….wait, yeah, they are Cigarette Sized Drainholes!!! VICTORY!! I turned on the shower and started pushing the cigarettes down the perfectly sized holes until they were all gone.

All was well, but wait. What about the three in the toilet, and what if I go upstairs and they heard the shower running. I immediately flushed the toilet again, and to my surprise the cigarettes went down this time like a bunch of defeated Nazi ships. Ok, good, now about the shower. I took my clothes off and hoped inside, then hoped right back out. I grabbed a towel and wiped myself off then put my clothes back on. When I got done I looked around and realized that I still had a huge problem. The packaging. I heard my dad’s voice and I thought my heart would climb out of my mouth and jump in the cold shower to cool it down and slow it from beating. “Time for Dinner boy!” He said. Well, that’s better than, “What the heck are you doing?” “Coming,” I managed to squeak out. I had no choice, I had to hide the packaging somewhere in the basement. I ran out of the bathroom and went to a deep cabinet and moved some glass vases and set the packaging down behind the vases. Then I looked at the stairs. Ok, breathe deeply and walk normally up the stairs.

When I got to the top I experienced rosacea in all it’s glory. Red is the color of lobsters, but I said nothing. Everything inside me hoped that dad had decided then and there to quit smoking cold turkey. The evening went on and dad began the long expected search for his cigarettes. He searched high and low looking for them but couldn’t find them. I remember that at one point he stopped and looked at me. I could feel my ears almost begin to whistle. Then Dad said, “Do you know where my cigarettes are?” I was literally in that moment in much of what I personally believe the fires of hell will be like. The pain and burning inside of me over lying to my dad were overwhelming, and yet my fear of him in that moment was greater, “I don’t know where they are dad. I haven’t seen them anywhere.” Quick lesson in lying…it is harder as a kid, and it gets easier as you grow, and that is a bad thing.

I have to end the story here, because the rest of the story isn’t for you to know. I am not concerned about your desire to hear the end, but rather your ability to understand my intensity about my dad not smoking.

I was hunting with my dad one weekend, and we decided that before we were going to go out, that we needed to go up the mountain and do some repairs to the stands. My dad borrowed a truck and we went up the mountain in Emmitsburg MD near where I grew up. The thorns, tree branches, and sticks on the ground all scratched up the sides of the truck to where my dad was in great stress that they would show to the owner. We purchased some high end car wash and wax and then began to scrub the truck and bathe it in the carnauba hoping that it would reverse our poor decision. Dad lit up a cigarette. Immediately I starting listing problems from smoking and the poor decision that it was to pump your lungs full of this stuff. I am sure that I told him how I wanted him to be around for a long time which means that he would need to change so that he could be. I remember there was a bit of a pause. I don’t remember the time, but of course now it feels like a good while before he spoke. “Can’t you accept me for who I am without trying to change me? Can you love me, right now, for me?”

A foolish person would immediate respond with something to defend their position and continue the division. Maybe they would say, “of course I accept you” or “I do love you now, that is why I am telling you this.” For maybe one of a few times in my life I wasn’t a foolish person. I let the words sink in. I thought about them and mulled over them. I breathed them in and out. I cherished them because my dad was trying to speak to me from his heart. Can you love me for me, right now, if nothing changed, if I smoked forever, if decided to destroy my body, if I get lung cancer and you want to say I told you so, if I go straight to hell because of this decision….could you love me? That question hit me hard and I had to wrestle with all the implications of it. Even now I continually am faced with new epiphanies from the depth of the question that I honestly believe that my dad was just asking because that is what he felt like he should say.

Shame. I put it behind me. You know what? I Was Wrong. My problem was that I wasn’t accepting my dad for who he was, a “smoker.” I decided that I wasn’t going to have that problem anymore. I was going to love him for who he was. That meant letting him live his life. If he wanted me to step in between him and cigarettes than by all means I would, but I was done pestering, fighting, nagging, quoting, and sneaking downstairs to put his cigarettes down the drain. I was done being divisive. I let love flood in where I had created a gulf of separation. I fully embraced him with his cigarettes and every other thing about him that may be different from me. I Love My Dad. It all began with Accepting him.

In retrospect I now realize that my inability to accept him for all of who he was had me go as far as lying which to me seems like a greater sin (one of the 10 commandments). I think what Jesus wanted me to learn from this experience is that I can stand up to the world and say I DO NOT SMOKE! But I can hang around and love people that do. Smoking isn’t for me, because God has revealed to ME that it is wrong and unhealthy. If that isn’t the case for you, I’m not trying to convince you of that, or pester you with that, or even hold it over your head. I love you for who you are with all of what you carry with you, and in spite of our differences. I accept you and I’ll let Jesus do the changing on you because ultimately isn’t it his job, not mine.